Signs of a good housewife. How to become an ideal housewife.
Who is a good housewife?
A woman is assigned the most responsible and important role in society; she must be the keeper of the hearth, constantly creating warmth and comfort in her home. A delicious dinner, a happy family and a clean house - these are the main signs by which you can identify a real housewife, who does not forget about herself. Remember that a woman should always remain a woman, even when cooking in the kitchen or working in the garden. And in order for housekeeping not to take up all your time and you can pay attention to yourself, you need to properly plan the implementation of all women’s responsibilities. A good housewife will do this competently, without depriving her loved ones of warmth and care and without turning into a tortured creature in a robe and curlers.
Becoming a truly good housewife is not easy. To do this, you need to train a number of qualities in yourself that will help keep your home in perfect order. Many books and manuals have been written about this, telling about the purpose of a woman and ways to improve her skills in housekeeping. But often such literature demands the impossible from a woman, and in trying to achieve the ideal, women simply become exhausted and lose all hope. However, don't despair. Everything is much simpler than it seems. In order for your family and friends to be proud of you and set you as an example, you just need to know a few secrets and little tricks that will make you an ideal housewife.
Family budget
One of the main tasks of a good housewife is keeping family records. Moreover, this should be a competent distribution of funds, and not a waste of money. Always write down all your expenses and family income. After each trip to the store, do not be lazy to devote a few minutes to such an important activity as counting waste. Make sure that all your purchases were necessary and that you did not purchase unnecessary or unnecessary items. To avoid making such mistakes, before going shopping, make a clear list that will indicate only everything you need, and when you come to the store, strictly follow the prepared list. Then your costs will always be moderate and expected, and the amount in the receipt from the store will not come as a surprise to you.
Schedule
Further, in order to have time to complete a lot of things, both large and small, of which the housewife has more than enough, you need to be able to properly manage your time. At the beginning of the day, plan all your activities, approximately calculating how much time you will need for each activity. Then prioritize them and get to work. Perhaps some of them can be combined and thereby carve out some free time for yourself. For example, putting a pie in the oven will give you time to wash the dishes or wipe off the dust. Don't forget that even when doing household chores, you should always look your best. top level, devoting at least half an hour to yourself every day to carry out the necessary cosmetic procedures.
Stocks and savings
A good housewife will always be aware of what is going on in her kitchen. All food supplies are at your disposal and your task is to monitor their quantity and replenish them on time. The best way to save yourself from the daily hustle and bustle of shopping in search of necessary small products, spices or cereals is to make purchases with a reserve. When you once again notice that the amount of food is coming to an end, do not be lazy to buy more food and put it in the cabinet “in reserve”. This way, you will not only be confident that everything you need will always be at your fingertips, but you will also significantly save your family budget, having the opportunity to save money for some major purchase.
Culinary skills
Any real housewife should not only cook deliciously, but also be able to feed unexpected guests, having in her stock several simple and quick recipes. In addition, you need to constantly improve your culinary skills, pleasantly surprising and delighting your family members with delicious and unusual dishes. A good housewife's husband is always well-fed and satisfied, because he knows that after work not only will there be something waiting for him loving woman, but also a warm dinner. Caring for your loved ones and meeting their needs is the key to excellent family relationships and mutual understanding between family members. The ability to maintain harmony and agreement in the home is also considered distinctive feature a good housewife.
Household
Don't forget about cleaning the house, which is one of the first places on the list of responsibilities of a good housewife. Your home should always be clean and tidy. Daily wet cleaning should become a systematic activity for you, which should not be neglected or put off until later. For general cleaning, it is best to choose a specific day of the week, and it is better that it falls on a weekend. Then you can involve all members of your family in cleaning, which will make your task much easier. If you have a clearly designated day for cleaning, you will be able to accurately plan your schedule, and the apartment will always be in excellent condition.
Remember that a good housewife does all the housework without harming herself and always remains attractive and feminine. Don’t forget to sometimes spend time on your appearance and update your wardrobe with fashionable outfits. Your spouse will appreciate this skill, because every man wants his woman to be not only an excellent cook, but also a socialite who knows how to behave in society. If you really want to become an ideal housewife, do not put it off until later and start developing the necessary traits and qualities in yourself now.
I'm certainly not a psychologist. But if someone asked my opinion about what is the root cause of most divorces, I would answer without hesitation that the reason for this is discord in bed between spouses. Adults don't really have that much pleasure in life. You can literally say everything: eat delicious food, sleep well and have good sex - let's call a spade a spade. Yes, we should give credit to the majority of Russian women. They cook delicious, plentiful and varied dishes. The mattress you choose is soft, the bed linen smells like lilies of the valley and it’s pleasant to sleep on. But the third point is just a problem. The devil knows why our precious ones still have words like “indecent” and “inconvenient” in their minds. It's downright creepy. The USSR was destroyed by bastards back in the day. There was no sex in it, although the demographics were off the charts. And now I’ll say this: it’s inconvenient to tuck a fur coat into your underpants, and it’s indecent to walk naked on the streets. But everything that happens under the family blanket is decent and comfortable.
Don’t be too angry, dear women. And shake your head. Yes, traditional performance Marital duties in the missionary position suit us for the first two to three years. I love borscht. But no matter how much I love him, I cannot eat only him all my life. Same thing in bed. It's tasty, it's good, but it gets boring. That’s why the critical time for couples is considered to be one, three, or five years of being together. The gap is explained by the man’s patience and shyness. He can eat one borscht for a year, and then demand caviar by slamming his fist on the table. The second one will choke on borscht for three years, and then subtly hint at oatmeal. The third, having had his fill of borscht up to the tomatoes, and not having received any variety in his diet, will leave to look for pineapples in another store.
Something carried me into metaphors... To put it simply, if your man really wants you standing, in the kitchen, in front of an open window and with the light on, then give him this caviar! I mean, sex. And if this is inconvenient and indecent for you, then don’t be offended.
Of course, this concept only makes sense to understand if your man is not some kind of dirty pervert. If he, shyly casting his eyes to the floor, offers you to try something from the list, which lies in strict order on the table of any psychiatrist, then kick him in the face. Straightaway.
P.S. The title should not offend in any way beautiful ladies, because it implies compliance with one of the components of the old wise truth “A wife should be a mistress in the kitchen, a lady in the living room, a whore in the bedroom.”
She excited fans with her statement that it is very important for a woman to be able to cook. “You’re not a woman if you don’t know how to cook,” the gymnast said categorically. The statement immediately sparked a flurry of discussion. According to some, a woman should really be able to cook and generally be a good housewife. Unless, of course, she dreams of family happiness. According to others, the wife’s homeliness in no way guarantees this happiness and completely different things are required to achieve it.
So should a wife be a good housewife or not?
Maintenance department
Most of us were taught from childhood that the main purpose of a wife is to be a good housewife. And many are still trying to meet this requirement.
The same Laysan believes that a woman who does not know how to cook is the same as a man who does not know how to drive a nail into a wall. According to the famous gymnast and mother of two children, the idea that women should not cook is inspired by the devil. Meanwhile, Utyasheva reminds us, everyone in their family had grandmothers and great-grandmothers who cooked. It's only recently that women have begun to argue that they don't have to do anything.
Many representatives of the fairer sex agree with her, believing that the main thing is family life- this is a tidy house and a deliciously fed husband.
“Isn’t the very word “wife” the meaning of a mistress? I believe that if she is a bad housewife, that means she is a bad wife,” one of the Internet users is sure.
A friend recently complained about her daughter-in-law, who turned out to be a useless housewife. As a result, after waiting for two years, her husband finally divorced her.
The guy needs to be fed and looked after so that he doesn’t run away. “I’ve been feeding my husband delicious food for 30 years, that’s why we’re still together,” she instructed.
By-effect
True, some women who adhere to this point of view become so obsessed with housework that they subordinate their entire lives to it, and at the same time the lives of their loved ones.
My neighbor irons, cleans, and cooks all day long. She begins to prepare for the arrival of guests almost half a month in advance - everything in the apartment should shine, and the treats should compete with restaurant dishes. Otherwise, God forbid, the guests will decide that she is a bad hostess. And there is no worse diagnosis for her.
Such women believe that keeping the house clean and cooking well is the main purpose of a wife. They are not interested in their husband's problems or his experiences. Yes, sometimes they simply do not understand them, because, completely fixated on the household, such women stop developing. Their range of interests gradually narrows to doing laundry, cooking and watching TV series. The husband’s inner world no longer fits into this circle.
As a result, the man next to you simply becomes bored. And he either begins to look for an outlet on the side, or leaves altogether.
A psychologist I knew told the story of his patient, from whom, 25 years later, life together her husband left, saying that all she had in her head was the kitchen and cleanliness. In such cases, the women themselves sincerely do not understand why their husband left: “And what did he need - fed, washed. What the hell else do you need?
Laysan Utyasheva with her husband Pavel Volya at the “Dancing” show
Fedorino grief
The main slogan of women in this category is: “I am not a housekeeper.” They firmly believe that the concept of " good wife“and “a good housewife” are not at all interconnected.
There are indeed many examples where women who are not distinguished by brilliant economic skills manage to live with their husbands in love and harmony.
As a rule, men who have adopted just such a lifestyle since childhood put up with the sloppiness of their wives. Their mothers were not known for their thriftiness, and they perceive such feminine behavior as the norm. Although there are men who, on the contrary, strive to find a wife who in this regard will be the complete opposite of their mother.
Many women today believe that the idea that a wife must be a housewife is morally outdated.
“Now is a different time. They don’t hire a wife to pickle cucumbers... I’m convinced of this. And we need to learn to live in a new way and perceive reality as it is,” says 26-year-old Svetlana.
According to many representatives of the fairer sex, today, when women work as much as men, they are no longer required to be good housewives.
“First you get busy at work, then you come home, you have to cook food, wash everything, wash it, iron it, get the kids ready, and your husband is lying on the sofa, reading the newspaper - he’s tired. It’s like I’m not tired?!” - Internet user Polina complains.
What does it mean “a good wife should be a good housewife?” - my 30-year-old colleague is indignant. - Then let's assume that good husband must be, for example, a good plumber or electrician. Why must a wife also be a housewife? This is the price list for which I was charged with the duties of washing dishes, cooking, doing laundry, etc. ? My husband just has to love me for who I am. Just like we love men with all their inability to fix taps, toilets, make repairs and cook dinners.
According to supporters of this idea, the ability to understand and feel a husband is much more important than the ability to cook delicious borscht and mop the floor until it shines.
And some men are actually satisfied with this state of affairs.
I know several families in which the wives do not bother themselves much with housekeeping, but their husbands do not resent this. One of them names her flexible character, ability to understand and forgive as the main advantages of her wife.
“She never nags me,” he admits.
By-effect
The homes of such women are often in constant chaos. Things never have their place. Households eat dry food, and the appearance of soup for lunch is equated with a feat.
The most important thing is that women who absolutely do not want to do housework most often turn out to be not the most attentive and sensitive wives. Psychologists explain this by saying that they are too passionate about their own aspirations and do not pay attention to the needs of others. That’s why they don’t try to provide their family with attention and care. The husbands of such women usually do not see not only borscht, but also simple human attention.
Relationships in such families, as experts say, are often built on the father-daughter principle. But if a woman does not internally grow and mature enough to perform basic female functions in the family, then the man will sooner or later begin to look elsewhere.
“My wife will cook it so much that it’s impossible to eat IT later! If you iron it like that, it will ruin the thing! He will clean up so much that he will either break something or leave dirt behind. Pig, in general, I have a wife... And she’s lazy in bed. The only plus: she looks pretty. But, probably, we need to get a divorce and look for a fat freak, but at least economical...” - a certain Sergei, 29 years old, complains on the Internet. Golden mean
Whatever one may say, a woman’s thriftiness is still perceived as one of her virtues. In the minds of most men, a woman’s desire to do household chores is a sign of caring. Therefore, economic women have always made an indelible impression on the stronger sex.
I'm seriously softened. And if she had offered me at that moment to marry her, I would not have hesitated to marry at that very moment,” he recalled. He married, however, in the end, to a completely different young lady, who was not particularly strong in the culinary arts. But at least their house is always clean and tidy. Although not ideal.
“Yes, perfect order and no need. Then walk around the apartment as if through a museum. But there shouldn’t be a feeling as if Mamai just passed by. Things should be in their places and the layer of dust should not be as thick as a finger. It should be just as comfortable at home,” forum member Doss is sure.
Many representatives of the fairer sex agree with this approach. They admit that they do not dislike doing housework. Moreover, they even like to clean the house or cook their favorite dishes. True, besides this they have many other favorite activities.
“Well, is it possible to live in a pigsty? I will clean, wash, iron and cook in the apartment, because I am pleased to live in cleanliness, and not in order to please a man! But I won’t turn household worries into the meaning of life either,” says forum member Natalya.
This approach, as psychologists say, is the most correct.
There is a certain set of established social roles. A man protects, a woman takes care. And housekeeping is one of the forms of manifestation of this care. But not the main one. A woman, of course, should take care of everyday life, but without fanaticism and playing the victim. She must start from the real needs - hers and her husband and children. Sometimes it is more important for a man that a woman just talk to him than scrub the floors. And the woman herself may not have the strength or desire to stand at the stove at some point, says psychologist Dmitry Oreshin.
The main thing, the psychologist believes, is that everyone in the family is guided by each other’s needs. And then the question of what and how a woman should be able to do around the house will be resolved by itself.
Even in adolescence girls dream of marrying the person they love, being happy with him all their lives and dying on the same day. But, alas, on cue magic wand wishes come true only in fairy tales.
In fact, well-being in the family “kingdom” depends only on the woman. Wherever she turns the direction of life, it will always be so. To preserve the family hearth, a woman has to be an artist in relation to her husband, a cook in the kitchen, and a prostitute in bed. A woman is born with such qualities as cunning, resourcefulness and the ability to keep the situation under control. You just need to know how to use this gift of nature. They say that any man can be molded into happiness. How? Here are a few rules that a woman can use to save her family.
In order for a man to be successful, he must be supported in all his ideas. If he sees his wife as an ally, he will trust her. This will help his wife to always be aware of his affairs, which will eliminate any unnecessary reason for jealousy. And in business management, who else but the wife will tell you how best to proceed in business matters. After all, this is your common future.
If a married couple has the same interests and hobbies, it brings them together more family relationships. Try to love the same hobbies as your husband. Of course, you won’t be able to sit over a glass of beer, but you could go fishing together. Believe me, this is not such a boring matter. Besides, it doesn’t hurt to spend the weekend fresh air. And you won’t always be able to eat fish cooked over a fire at home, in the stuffy bustle of the city.
Don’t forget to take gentle care of your appearance even after the wedding. A couple of strokes with the brush and light makeup is ready. The point is not that without makeup your husband will begin to love you less. But he should know that his wife is always in shape.
The way to a man's heart is through his stomach? Try to feed your husband tasty, low-calorie foods, get creative with fruits and vegetables, but don’t forget about meat and dairy products. Your husband needs to see and know how much you care about him. healthy way life. Only you should know that you yourself are on a light diet, and all preparations are intended not only for his well-being.
Men love and respect their mothers very much. If you make friends with his mother, you have won his heart, and in your mother-in-law you have gained an ally. Believe me, the mother-in-law is not such an evil and harmful old woman. One has only to show her how much you care about her beloved son - a place will appear in her heart for you next to your son. To make friends with your mother-in-law, you need to be more interested in her health and share secrets with her regarding her son. Mothers are especially worried about their daughters-in-law caring for their sons properly. So ask her more often about her child’s childhood weaknesses and his habits.
Friendship with your mother-in-law plays an important role in your relationship with your husband, and your mother-in-law can also benefit your relationship. You can always turn to her for advice. Your husband, in turn, will treat your parents with the same respect.
And the most important point of our advice is your personal sexual relationships. This section plays a very important role in your life together. Try to make sexual intercourse enjoyable for both of you. Therefore, do not hesitate to experiment, tell your husband about your feelings, choose best ways and poses.
It is very important! Even over the years, when passions subside, you shouldn’t give up on sex life. Watch sexy films, be interested in relevant literature, but your sex life should be active until old age!
When the baby is born, don't focus only on him. Don't forget about your figure and appearance. A woman should be blooming. Motherhood is happiness. And if you take care of yourself after giving birth, this will be beneficial both in your relationship with your husband and in raising your child. After all, a child from the cradle remembers the smiling, happy faces of his forever loving parents. And happiness will always have a positive effect on your appearance.
