Effective people management. Joe Owen How to manage people. Ways to influence others. Methods of psychological influence

The art of making things happen

Scientific editor of the Russian edition Valery Nikishkin, professor, dean of the Faculty of Marketing of the Russian Academy of Economics named after. G. V. Plekhanova

The publishing house expresses gratitude to Yulia Kurylenko, Anastasia Kazakova and Roman Malakhovsky for their assistance in scientific editing of the book.

© Jo Owen 2006, 2009

© Studio Art. Lebedeva, cover design, 2010

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“Napoleon once said: “To manage is to foresee,” and Joe Owen claims that to manage is to bring something to a successful conclusion. The main thing is achievements, not activity. This attacking management ideology raises many questions. What results do I want to achieve? What results do my partners and clients expect? What should be done for this? How to motivate yourself and those around you to move towards the intended result together? With whom to achieve results, and with whom to abandon along the way? Who is needed today? Who will be needed tomorrow? And many, many others. But the author does not leave any of these questions unanswered, or at least advice on how to get it. Owen's level of managerial competence is determined by his ability to achieve results.

Read this book, try to apply Owen's principles to managing your business - and you will see that only focusing on results will lead you to achieve the desired results."

Vadim Marshev

Honored Professor of Moscow State University. M. V. Lomonosova, Doctor of Economic Sciences

Introduction
Real managers in real conditions

Management was once much simpler: managers led and employees worked. Managers sold their brains, and workers sold their hands. Thoughts and deeds were divided. These were Good times for managers, but bad for workers.

But over time, managers began to have problems. Workers began to expand their rights, and managers began to lose their privileges; workers now worked less, and managers had to stay late. The reduction in working hours, which gave employees all the benefits, turned into constant stress for managers chained to the computer, documents and telephone. Management has become not only much more difficult, but also more incomprehensible. Think, for example, about the secret to your organization's success and survival. It is unlikely that you will be able to find any formal criterion for her well-being.

What risks must I take to survive, and what risks must I take to succeed?

What projects should you work on and with whom?

When is it better to defend your point of view, and when to give in?

How does everything really happen here?

What pitfalls should you avoid?

No company policy manual or training program can answer these questions. You are left to your own devices when it comes to the most important things, and the manual only indicates the minor things.

The rules of survival and success are dictated by practice: we compare people who achieved success and survived with those who faced difficulties, and then analyze why they succeeded or failed.

Take a look at the successful people in your organization. I hope those of them who can boast of some achievements were among the winners. But in organizations with a horizontal structure, it is quite difficult to find out who is responsible for what.

Most rating systems rely on two characteristics, which are called completely differently.

Traditionally, it was assumed that managers (who had brains) were smarter than workers (who had hands). A high IQ, or quotient, helped intellectual development. Many assessment systems are still focused on IQ: many business schools still accept students based on the results of an IQ test in the form of the GMAT (General Managerial Aptitude Test). A high IQ is believed to be a sign of problem solving, analytical skills, business thinking and knowledge.

Even if you are a genius, this is not enough to manage people. Managing is the ability to carry out assigned tasks, that is, to get things done. Many smart people with high IQs are too smart to do anything. Most companies require managers to have good interpersonal skills, or good EQ (emotional quotient). This involves the ability to work in a team, adapt, interact effectively with others, as well as having charisma and the ability to motivate employees, etc.

Now look at all your managers and try using IQ and EQ to check which of them in your organization have succeeded and who have not. There should be quite a few managers with high IQ and EQ: smart (IQ) and pleasant (EQ) managers exist, despite the established media stereotypes. But you will also find a lot of smart and nice people who are content with mediocre results somewhere on the margins of the company: everyone likes them, but they do not move anywhere from their “swamp”. However, there are many successful managers, perhaps not so smart and nice, who rise to the top by using intellectual managers as a doormat on the way to the executive office.

Something is missing here. High IQ and EQ are a huge plus, but they are not enough. Managers have one more hurdle to overcome. Their lives have become much more difficult, not easier.

The new obstacle concerns political experience, or PQ - the political quotient, which assumes, among other things, the ability to achieve power. Moreover, we are talking about the ability to use power to achieve tasks. Thus, PQ is the main aspect of management, which is to accomplish tasks with the help of people.

Of course, managers have always needed a certain level P.Q. But in the command-and-control hierarchy of the past, high PQ was not required to complete tasks; an order was enough. IN modern world horizontal, matrix organizations, power is a vague and undefined concept. Managers will achieve nothing without the support of allies, without going beyond official responsibilities. Many of the resources they will need simply do not exist in their organization. Therefore, managers today, more than ever, need a high PQ to achieve their goals.

Successful managers have three qualities - IQ, EQ and PQ. Each of them involves skills that can be learned. To become a good manager, you will need some special scientific knowledge(In many scientific institutions full smart people and poor management), but rather EQ and PQ skills that anyone can master.

This book teaches you how to develop the capabilities underlying IQ, EQ, and PQ that will help you survive and succeed in your transformation. By abstracting yourself from the day-to-day complexities of management and the chatter of management theory, you can focus on the critical capabilities needed to be a manager. The book tells you what you need to do and how to do it in a world that is tougher and more complex than ever.

The first step in understanding this revolution is to understand its causes and ultimate goal.

IQ: rational management

Management has been around as long as our civilization - even if no one realized it before. As an independent discipline, management originated during the Industrial Revolution: large-scale activities required large-scale organization. At first, management was based on military strategy and tactics: the classic command-and-control style.

Gradually, industrial management dissociated itself from the military. Like Newton, who discovered the laws of physics, managers were looking for a mysterious formula for success in business and management. Scientists are still looking for this formula, although successful entrepreneurs can do without theory. Scientific management was the first attempt to put success under a microscope.

A leading figure in scientific management was Frederick Taylor, whose Principles of Scientific Management (The Principles of Scientific Management) were published in 1911. The following quote illustrates his approach:

“One of the basic requirements for a man who is fit to work in blast furnace iron is to be so dull and phlegmatic that his mental faculties are more like an ox than anything else. That is why a reasonable person with a lively mind is completely unsuited for such monotonous work.”

Taylor disliked workers in general, believing that they would perform poorly if they were not punished. But his book was based not only on personal opinion, but also on direct observations. This led him to some ideas that were considered revolutionary at the time.

Workers should be allowed to rest so that they can be more productive.

People with different qualities should be given appropriate jobs because in the right position they will perform better.

A machine line that breaks a complex job (such as assembling a car or fast food) into parts increases productivity and reduces labor costs for workers who are required to have minimal abilities.

These principles continue to this day.

The world of scientific, or rational, management was created thanks to Henry Ford, who proposed the assembly line for assembling cars. Between 1908 and 1913, he refined the concept and began production of the Model T, which he called with great aplomb " a passenger car for the masses." By 1927, an estimated 15 million Model Ts rolled off the assembly line, wiping out the cottage industry that assembled cars at very high prices.

Rational management is alive today, in the 21st century, it still exists on automobile assembly lines and telephone exchanges, in fast food restaurants, where hapless operators work like machines. However, many companies have already taken the next, quite logical step, completely removing people and forcing their customers to communicate with computers.

EQ: emotional management

The world of rational, scientific management was relatively simple: it relied on observation and cold calculation.

And then things got complicated.

At some point, someone discovered that workers are not just production units or even consumer units. They have hopes, fears, feelings, and sometimes even thoughts. They are, essentially, people. This confused the managers' cards. They had to not only solve production problems, but also manage people.

Over time, leading people has become more difficult. The workers, already more educated and professional than before, now had more to give, but also expected more. They became richer and more independent. The days of single-industry towns, where everyone worked at the same enterprise, were numbered: there were new job opportunities and higher benefits for those who could not or would not find work. Employers have lost their coercive power. They could no longer demand loyalty; they had to earn it. There was a gradual transition from a culture of submission to a culture of interest.

Managers had to create conditions for people to be highly productive and engaged by tapping into their hopes rather than their fears. 44 years after the publication of Frederick Taylor's book, Daniel Goleman released his work Emotional Intelligence: Why It's More Important Than IQ ( Emotional Intelligence: Why it can matter more than IQ, 1995), becoming the father of the new world of emotional management. Essentially, he popularized principles that had been evolving for decades. As early as 1920, E. L. Thorndike of Columbia University wrote about “social intelligence.” Experts have long understood that intelligence (high IQ) is not directly related to success in life: other aspects are also important. As part of professional activities, experiments with emotional intelligence (EQ, not IQ) have long been conducted. In particular, the Japanese have made great strides in effectively engaging employees, even on automobile production lines, through a new movement called kaizen (continuous improvement). Ironically, they were inspired to do this by the American W. Edwards Deming. Deming's ideas were recognized in the United States only after the Japanese began to destroy the American automobile industry with their help.

By the end of the 20th century, the job of a manager had become much more difficult than at the end of the 19th century. Managers of the 20th century had to be as smart as their predecessors 100 years ago. They needed EQ to interact with people as much as they needed IQ to solve production problems. Most managers have found that they are good at one thing: few have both high IQ and EQ. The bar for effective management has been raised high.

PQ: political management

There are no two-dimensional managers, except in cartoons. Real people and real managers are three-dimensional. High IQ and EQ are a big plus, but they are not enough to explain the success or failure of different managers. What is missing? The first step in finding the missing element is to recognize that organizations are designed for conflict. This is a revelation to some scientists who believe they are meant to collaborate. In reality, managers have to compete for their organization's time, money and budget, which are quite limited. There are always more needs than resources. The internal conflict has to do with the way priorities are set—with marketing, production, service, human resources, and the various products and regions fighting each other to grab a bigger piece.

For many managers, real competition does not take place in the market. The real competition is sitting at the next table, fighting for the same promotions and bonuses as them.

The second step is identifying who wins and who loses in this corporate battle over budget, time, salary and promotion. If you believe the concept of high IQ and EQ, then all smart and nice people should achieve success. However, in reality this is far from the case. The smart and nice don't always win: many of them disappear from the corporate radar or live the quiet life of people who have not reached their potential. At the same time, most of us know top managers who can hardly be called smart or pleasant, but in some mystical way they achieve power and recognition.

Obviously there is something beyond IQ and EQ.

A short conversation at the water cooler is usually enough to understand what is missing. There they often talk about those who rise or fall on the career ladder, about who does what and for whom, about promising opportunities, about disastrous projects and the ability to avoid them. Conversations like this show that humans are not only social animals, but also political ones.

Politics are inevitable in any organization. And this is not new. Shakespeare's Julius Caesar is a play about politics. Machiavelli's The Prince is a guide to successful political management during the Renaissance. Politics have always existed, but it was considered too dirty for scientific analysis and corporate training. The assassination of Caesar shows what happens when you don't understand politics well. When someone mentions Brutus telling Caesar, “I am behind you,” vigilant managers know they may be stabbed in the back.

In order to understand such politics, IQ and EQ are not enough. There is a continuous struggle for control and power. The never-ending need for change is not just about people, but also about the balance of power in an organization. This is a political activity for which a successful manager needs good political and organizational skills.

MQ: Managerial Development Quotient

It's time to recognize that real managers are three-dimensional. In addition to IQ and EQ, they need a high PQ. If there is a formula for success in management, it might look like this:

where MQ is the management quotient.

To increase MQ it is necessary to develop IQ, EQ and PQ. The formula for success is easy to formulate, but difficult to implement. MQ (Figure 1) is concerned with the practice rather than the theory of management. This book shows how to use MQ to define:

The level of your own managerial potential;

The abilities of team members and the ability to help them improve;

The basic skills needed for success and their subsequent development; rules for survival and success in your organization.

Rice. 1. MQ Components

There are many ways to apply the MQ formula and succeed or fail. Each person develops and applies IQ, EQ and PQ differently, depending on the situation. Every person has a unique management style, just like their DNA. In this book you will not find a method for producing managerial clones. You deserve better. We offer basic principles and tools to help you understand and solve common management problems.

Some people think of fundamentals as a prison: they apply the same formula to every situation. Others use the principles as the foundation for building their own, unique management style. This book, based on thousands of years of experience as practicing managers, helps adapt tools and basic principles, talking not only about theory, but also about the real effectiveness or ineffectiveness (which is more important) of certain methods. We all learn from experiences - positive and negative. With this book, you can develop your MQ to succeed—on your own terms.

Chapter 1
IQ abilities: problems, tasks and money

Being a smart manager does not mean being an intellectual. Brilliant scientists rarely make great managers. Conversely, many great entrepreneurs today did not waste money and time on an MBA with its conformist mindset: for example, Bill Gates, Warren Buffett, Richard Branson and Steve Jobs.

Asking the most successful managers what makes them the most successful is the same as practicing flattery and ingratiation. This only leads to banal answers and narcissism. I tried and realized that it was not worth doing. Managers mostly talk about “experience” and “intuition.” And this is completely useless. Intuition cannot be learned. And experience is the way to keep assistant managers in assistant positions until they have enough gray hair to join the management club. I had to go a different route to figure out how managers think. I decided to watch them work.

Watching people work is always much more enjoyable than doing it yourself.

Every person is unique and every day is different.

Some people prefer personal communication rather than email correspondence. e-mail; Some days are overloaded with important meetings, some people work more and some work less. But if you remove all these differences, you can identify something common to managers:

Severe time fragmentation;

Simultaneous work on several tasks;

Control different groups people and competing projects;

A continuous flow of new information requiring response, change, adaptation;

Lack of time to work alone.

There is an example familiar to most managers - trying to juggle balls and at the same time run a hundred meters without dropping a single ball. It's a world where it's easy to be busy, but very difficult to achieve anything. Activity does not guarantee success. Today, managers are faced with the challenge of achieving the greatest results with the least effort. Let’s take a short break and think about what’s missing from a manager’s daily routine:

Decision making using formal methods such as Bayesian analysis and decision trees;

Solving problems after deep reflection alone or through group work using formal problem-solving techniques;

Formal strategic business analysis.

Many MBA methods are notable for the fact that they are absent from the daily practice of most managers: organizational and strategic theory has disappeared; financial and accounting instruments are related only to finance and accounting; Marketing remains a completely mysterious area for production and IT employees.

The fact that most managers do not use these tools in their work does not diminish their importance. They can be used carefully, at the most critical moments. Most organizations would not survive long if all their managers were constantly engaged in strategic business research. But good strategic analysis that CEO held every five years, can transform the company.

So, the search for principles of thinking for managers has come to a standstill in the whirlwind of activity that fills their typical day. It seems that successful managers do not need to be great intellectuals and master the standard intellectual and analytical tools that are offered in the relevant literature and in special courses. But you have to be a very brave person to accuse Bill Gates and Richard Branson of stupidity. All the leaders and managers we interviewed were smart enough to achieve power and influence. They are smart, but not in the traditional, school sense. Managerial intelligence is different from scientific intelligence.

We decided to dig deeper, breaking the golden rule: “If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.” I hope we haven't dug ourselves a hole. We are simply trying to unearth the basic principles of managerial thinking. And in the end, we found these fundamental principles, which will be discussed in this chapter, which any manager can master.

1. Start with the end in mind: Focus on the outcome.

2. Achieve results: work and understanding.

3. Make decisions: quickly develop intuition.

4. Solve problems: methods, schemes and tools.

5. Strategic thinking: basics, features and classical approach.

6. Determine the budget: policy for achieving the goal.

7. Managing the budget: an annual battle.

8. Manage costs: with minimal costs.

9. Spreadsheets and calculations: guesswork, not math.

10. Know your data: manipulation of numbers.

If we were precise and scrupulous, not all of these skills would be included in the chapter on IQ management. But behind the apparent randomness there is a certain method. A focus on results and achieving results is included in this chapter because these principles underlie effective management. An effective manager is driven by the desire to achieve results and achieve goals. This creates a certain style of thinking - very pragmatic, impetuous and completely different from those described in books and studied in institutes. The main thing is achievements, not activity.

Decision making, problem solving and strategic thinking are classic IQ abilities. There is a huge difference between the way textbooks tell managers to think and the way they actually think. Textbooks are looking for the perfect answer. But the ideal solution is the enemy of the practical solution. The search for an ideal leads to inaction. Practical decisions lead to what good managers need: action. For many managers, the real problem is not finding the answer, but asking the question. In fact, successful managers spend far more time searching for a question than searching for a pragmatic answer.

Defining a budget, managing budgets and expenses, preparing settlement documents and knowing the numbers can be called FQ - financial quotient. We believed that finance and accounting were 100 percent IQ skills. And they turned out to be 100 percent wrong. In theory, financial management is an objective and intellectual activity in which there are two types of answers - right and wrong: either everything fits or it doesn’t fit. But for managers, the intellectual task is only a small part of the real task. The main challenge is not about intellectual ability: it is political. Most financial discussions and negotiations are political discussions about money, power, resources, obligations and expectations. In many ways, financial management belongs in the chapter on PQ (political intelligence). Out of respect for financial theory, we included it in the chapter on IQ.

In subsequent sections we will do justice to the theory. It is not without its benefits: good theory provides a framework for structuring and understanding unstructured and complex issues. However, the main attention should be paid to the practical side of the development and application of IQ abilities.

Bayesian probability theory is one of the main theorems of elementary probability theory, which determines the probability that some event occurred (hypothesis), having only indirect evidence (data), which may be inaccurate.

Good afternoon, dear readers! Whether we like it or not, we influence other people throughout our lives. Whether this influence will be under your control depends only on your desire. There is a simple influence technique that will help you achieve what you want at minimal cost. Today I would like to talk about exactly this. Human psychology: how to manage people.

Why do you need people management?

Good managers in large companies undergo numerous trainings and practical exercises to learn how to influence people. For a multi-million dollar corporation to run like clockwork, management must be able to manage people. But these skills can help ordinary people in everyday situations.

I'll give you a simple example. The wife wants her husband to take out the trash. She follows him and constantly says: throw out the trash, throw out the trash, throw out the trash. As a result, she annoys him so much that he freaks out, they fight, and as a result, the garbage remains in its place, and the spouses do not speak for a couple of days. How much smarter it would be for the wife to do things differently if she knew a couple of influence techniques.

The ability to manage people can be useful not only in professional field, but also in your personal life when you interact with a partner, friend or parents. Many conflict situations could have been easily avoided if you had used one of the control techniques.

We often want other people to do what we want, but we don’t always understand how to achieve this. Studying the psychology of influence helps you acquire the necessary mechanisms that will work for you and help you not spoil your relationships with others.

Power requires responsibility

When learning influence techniques, you need to remember responsibility. You can’t just manage people and not take responsibility for it. The simple ability to manipulate will not be enough to achieve the desired result.

Remember that your influence on another person leaves its mark on his life. It is very important to remember balance here.

Both of you should benefit from the position, neither of you should experience psychological or physical discomfort, and there should be no humiliation of human dignity.

Managing people does not mean condoning their desires. A person is always obliged to respect another person, value his freedom of choice and not try to take control of him. It is very important to be able to use techniques for the benefit of all participants in the process.

Bad and good manipulations

There are people who, in their thirst to get what they want, are ready to go over their heads, sweep away everything around them and do not take anyone into account. This is bad manipulation. When there is no respect for people, one's own benefit is put first - this is greed, which can destroy with one wrong move.

A good manipulation is that you get the desired result and at the same time the other participants benefit from the situation for themselves. At a minimum, the rule “do no harm” must be observed. If the other person does not receive anything useful, then at least he should not receive anything negative.

When you achieve your goal with the blood of other people, then this is bad manipulation and you have absolutely no concept of responsibility, honesty and dignity.

Healthy communication is built on mutual benefit. This is how you can achieve great success.

Several techniques

So, we come to the most interesting part. I bring to your attention ways through which you can achieve the desired result faster and easier. There are simpler ones, which we will start with, and there are others that will take a long time to learn.

Exaggerating differences. People tend to see more differences in objects that are clearly different.

I will give you a simple and understandable example. When I studied the psychology of influence, this principle became one of my favorites and I used it almost always and everywhere.

One day, I came to a friend and asked for a thousand dollars, citing an urgent loan payment. Of course, he refused, albeit very nicely. Next, I asked him to lend me his player on vacation. With a wide smile and joy, he gave me his gadget for temporary use.

In fact, I didn't need a thousand dollars, my goal was his player. But I knew how a guy would feel about such things. He never lent anyone their equipment. And then I decided to try this principle of influence. When he refused me a larger favor (a thousand dollars), he easily agreed to a smaller favor.

Another everyday example. I asked my husband to go to the store. It's already dark and cold outside. Of course he refused. Then the second less serious request was to take out the trash. To which he quickly agreed.

Remember that this principle should not be abused. A request that is too big will obviously look stupid. Prepare in advance, foresee what the person will definitely refuse, but this will not be an excessive request.

One good turn deserves another. A person who has received something will definitely want to repay in the same coin. We don't like to appear ungrateful in the eyes of others.

This principle is often used by sales representatives. They give you small souvenirs as a gift, and then offer you an annual subscription or purchase a product on sale. You feel obligated for the souvenir and make a subscription.

In everyday life, this principle can be used in different ways. You provide a small favor to the person, and when you ask for a response, he is more likely to agree.

Social proof. Man is accustomed to looking back at others. When we see someone doing this, we allow ourselves to do the same.

This principle can be easily seen in smokers. When a person doesn’t know whether he can smoke here or not and he doesn’t see anyone smoking around, he is unlikely to get a cigarette. And if he notices at least one smoker nearby, he will immediately take a pack out of his pocket.

You can use this principle to your advantage in different situations. For example, if your friend became ill on the street, and you have neither a phone nor money with you. Just stop any passerby and say: call an ambulance. Ask another passerby for water. People around you will begin to pay attention and act on the principle of social proof. Before you know it, there will be several dozen assistants around.

In addition, a person will happily perform a favor for someone who often praises him. Compliments can play a big role in managing people, don't neglect them. You can see by the expression on your interlocutor’s face how your compliments and praise affect him.

Deficit. The strongest principle of influence that entrepreneurs use. They constantly run promotions with limited quantities of products. A person wants to have something unique and special. Therefore, when he sees the last can on the shelf, he is most likely to take it.

You can manipulate your time by saying that you have limited time. When a subordinate comes to the boss, the boss says “I don’t have much time, so let’s get straight to the point.” The subordinate values ​​the boss’s time and values ​​such meetings. The main thing is that such a phrase does not seem disdainful.

These are not all the ways to manage people. You will find many useful and practical tips in Robert Cialdini’s book “The Psychology of Influence.” If you don't have enough time to read, then you can always find an audiobook option.

Remember that managing people is a thing that requires a lot of responsibility from you. You should not manipulate your loved ones.

In the article "" I talk about possible troubles associated with the desire to take loved one under your strict control.

Do you have your own techniques for influencing people? How do you achieve what you want? What techniques do you use? Do you notice a similar influence on yourself from those around you?

Remember to be responsible for your influence on others!

He argued that the ability to interact correctly with people is a product that can be bought, like regular sugar or coffee. But such a skill costs much more than anything else in the whole world.

If you want to achieve success and learn how to manage people, then these words of the great American entrepreneur should become your life credo. A person can grow only in close interaction with society. From childhood, each of us masters the basic patterns of behavior and worldview, obtained through a long path of historical, biological and mental development humanity.

In order to have influence and control another person, it is not enough to know his personal and behavioral characteristics. The most important thing is to learn to use this knowledge, master special methods and techniques for influencing and controlling the behavior of another, based on his worldview, character, personality type and other important psychological characteristics.

If you want to learn how to manage people, the secret technologies from this article will reveal to you not only the theoretical side of the issue, but will also allow you to use this knowledge in real life.

Use mental characteristics

To help people look beyond consciousness, professionals use various methods and techniques. One of the most effective of these is hypnosis. This is a method of direct influence on the psyche, the essence of which is to introduce a person into a narrowed state of consciousness, in which he is easily susceptible to someone else’s suggestion and control.

Using hypnosis for such a purpose is unprofessional and even illegal. Therefore, psychologists use hypnosis solely for the purpose of “pulling out” from the unconscious sphere of the psyche those repressed thoughts and experiences that interfere with productive living and are the foundation of many problems and conflicts.

The ability to manage people, first of all, lies in using knowledge of human psychology and his personal characteristics. They help you change your own behavior in such a way that this change causes the reaction you want from others. Try to be more observant in communication, this will help you better understand individual psychological characteristics interlocutor. Based on this knowledge, try using the following methods and techniques to help you manage people correctly and effectively:

“Demand More” Technique

The essence of this technique for managing people is to ask the person for much more than you actually need. Or just ask him to do something weird. Of course he will refuse. After some time, you can confidently ask for what you really need. The psychology of managing people in this case is that the person will feel uncomfortable and will no longer be able to refuse you, moreover, the second request, in comparison with the previous one, will look insignificant in his eyes.

Contact by name

This is advice from the famous psychologist Dale Carnegie, who argued that calling others by name affirms their personal importance. For each of us, our name is the most pleasant combination of sounds; it is a real confirmation of the fact of our existence.

By calling others by name, thereby affirming their importance, you will receive favor and respect in return. The same is true with titles, titles and social roles. For example, if you call a person your friend, then soon he will really experience friendly feelings towards you.

Technique "Flattery"

At first glance, everything is very simple, you just need to arouse someone else's sympathy with the help of compliments and pleasant remarks. But be careful, because if you notice insincerity, you will cause very strong negative emotions in your interlocutor. You always need to know in relation to whom and in what situation such methods should be used. If you flatter a demonstrative person with high self-esteem, then expect a positive reaction.

The psychology of management here is that each of us feels comfortable in a state of cognitive balance when external influences confirm our own thoughts and feelings.

Technique "Reflection"

The point is to copy the person's behavior to some extent. People like people who are similar to them more. Interestingly, if someone has recently “mirrored” a person, then for some time it will be much more pleasant for him to interact with other people, with those who did not take part in the previous conversation. The psychology of management in this case is the same as in the case of calling by name.

Opponent fatigue effect

If you ask a person an important request when he is feeling tired, he will most likely refuse to comply. But if you emphasize its importance, then the next day it will be difficult for him to refuse you a second time, and he will fulfill the request.

The fact is that failure to keep a promise causes psychological discomfort in people.

A simple request.

Ask the person for something insignificant, something that will not be at all difficult for him to do. After that, ask to do something more difficult. The effect of such a request is that the person quietly becomes accustomed to the gradual increase in difficulty.

Be careful, do not ask to do everything at once; there should be quite long pauses between requests. Otherwise, people will regard your attitude as impudence.

Listen carefully to your interlocutor.

This is the ability to find compromises and be sensitive to a person’s emotions, respect his personal opinion. If you do not agree with the position of your interlocutor, you do not need to immediately express your protest and put forward counterarguments. You need to learn to listen carefully.

After his monologue, agree that his opinion is valuable to you and only then express your vision. This way, he will feel important and will try to listen to you, even if he does not share your opinion.

Paraphrasing words

This technique is an important tool for establishing trusting contact between people. Its essence lies in the fact that during a conversation you should sometimes pronounce the general meaning of the words and feelings of your interlocutor, only in your own words. This will help the other person understand themselves better, and will also help them see you as an understanding and compassionate friend.

Strong-willed and powerful people manage to manipulate others especially easily. It is usually difficult to refuse, so they have more influence on others.

Now you know how to control people; secret technologies in this case are the secrets of the human psyche. As you can see, such methods of interaction with other people can become a tool that will help to form a positive image of yourself and your “I” in the mind of your interlocutor.

Many things are incomprehensible to us not because our concepts are weak; but because these things are not included in the range of our concepts.

Kozma Prutkov

Attempts to control a person, a group of people and other human communities often encounter resistance from the latter. In this case, two paths are open to the initiator of the control action:

to attempt force perform the action imposed on them, that is, break resistance (open control); disguise control action so that it does not cause objections (hidden control).

It is clear that it is impossible to use the second method after the failure of the first - the intention has been guessed and the addressee is on guard.

The second method is used when they anticipate resistance and therefore immediately rely on the concealment of the influence.

In fact, in every group of people there is a person who influences others, often unnoticed, and others unconsciously obey him.

Hidden control is carried out against the will of the addressee and allows for the latter’s possible disagreement with what is proposed (otherwise the initiator has no reason to hide his intentions).

Is it moral to secretly control another person against their will? It depends on the degree of morality of the initiator's goals. If his goal is to gain personal gain at the expense of the victim, then it is certainly immoral. We call hidden control of a person against his will, bringing unilateral benefits to the initiator, manipulation. The initiator controlling the impact will be called manipulator and the recipient of the impact - victim(manipulation).

Thus, manipulation is a type of hidden control determined by selfish, unseemly goals manipulator, causing damage (material or psychological) to its victim.

Hidden management can pursue quite noble goals. For example, when a parent, instead of giving orders, quietly and painlessly controls the child, unobtrusively pushing him to take action in the right direction. Or the same thing in the relationship between a manager and a subordinate. In both cases, the object of control retains its dignity and consciousness of its own freedom. Such hidden control is not manipulation.

Likewise, if a woman, with the help of all sorts of feminine tricks, secretly controls a man so that he gets rid of bad habits(alcohol abuse, smoking, etc.), then such management can only be welcomed. In other cases, it is quite difficult to draw the line between whether it is manipulation or not. Then the term “hidden control” will have a broader meaning.

In the general case of hidden control, we will call the initiator of the control action managing entity or simply subject or sender impact. Accordingly, we will call the recipient of the impact managed object or simply object(impact).

True wisdom comes to each of us when we realize how little we understand in life, in ourselves, in the world around us.

I cannot control the direction of the wind, but I can always set the sails in such a way as to achieve my goal.

O. Wilde

1.1. TYPES OF NEEDS

Four Sources of Manipulation

In us, in our misunderstanding of ourselves, lies the opportunity to manipulate us.

We are controlled by our needs.

Each of us has some weaknesses.

Each is characterized by certain addictions.

We are all accustomed to acting according to the rules, observing rituals.

All this can be used (and is used!) by manipulators.

Classification of needs

The following classification of human needs, proposed by A. Maslow, is generally accepted.

- Physiological needs (food, water, shelter, rest, health, desire to avoid pain, sex, etc.).

- The need for security, confidence in the future.

- The need to belong to some community (family, group of friends, like-minded people, etc.).

- The need for respect, recognition. The need for self-realization.

At the same time, psychologists have established the enormous importance of positive emotions for a person’s mental health (and therefore physical health).

Satisfying each of the above needs brings positive emotions. However, there are things and circumstances that also give us similar emotions, but are not related to any of the five types of needs. For example, good weather, a beautiful landscape, a funny scene, an interesting book or conversation, favorite activities, etc. Therefore, we consider it possible to supplement A. Maslow’s classification with another, sixth type: need for positive emotions.

1.2. PHYSIOLOGICAL NEEDS

Food is a pleasure. Enjoyment of taste. But every time you eat, the acid-base balance is disrupted and there is a danger of caries. Chewing gum "Dirol" with xylitol and urea protects your teeth from morning to evening!

Contagious example

In the American city of Cleveland, the director of the zoo was very upset by the behavior of a young gorilla - she stubbornly refused to eat. Therefore, he climbed into her cage every day, ate fruits, bread, and roast until the inexperienced gorilla, imitating him, learned to eat on its own.

Then things went on their own - the physiological need for food plus the acquired skill did their job: the cub gained weight.(However, during his training, the director also gained 15 kg and is now exhausting himself with diets in order to get rid of excess weight.)

How to overcome your husband's laziness

The inhabitant of the cottage turns to her neighbor, a woman with an excellent figure, who has gone out into her garden: “Darling, could you put on your bikini swimsuit? It suits you so well!”

Having received consent, she enters her house and says to her husband: “Would you like to see what kind of swimsuits are now in fashion? Just like the one the neighbor is wearing. At the same time, mow the lawn.”

It is clear that the wife is using an erotic stimulus to force her husband to work. In addition, the husband, inflamed by the sight of seductive female forms (the wife knows this from experience), in bed in the evening will not be as lazy as usual.

With this manipulation, the wife achieves two goals at once.

Naked truth

The effectiveness of manipulations using sexual-erotic needs is also evidenced by the following historical episode.

Greetings, dear readers! I remember as a child, when I was about 11, I really wanted my parents to give me a Dandy game console. I couldn’t think of any other way to get the desired gift other than begging and whining every day. My parents were angry, but in the end, six months later, they still gave me the coveted console.

Then, when I grew up, I again faced the problem of how to get what I wanted from my husband, children, and work colleagues. Here it was already useless to beg them or ask them 1000 times to do what I needed. Then I decided to learn the art of manipulation. Imagine, you can learn this! Want to learn how to manage people? Then continue reading! I have collected for you the most interesting techniques and manipulation techniques.

Let's first figure out what it means to manipulate people. In psychology, manipulation is understood as the process of social psychological impact on a person in order to influence his behavior or change his attitude.

This influence is usually hidden. A person, as a rule, does not understand that he performs some actions not of his own free will, but at the will of the manipulator. For example, we are daily influenced by social standards, advertising, political propaganda and agitation, and criticism. Under their influence, most people make appropriate decisions and behave in the way that manipulators need.

The victim of manipulation does not suspect that she is being influenced. She commits actions against her own will and desire. The goal of the manipulator is always to obtain the desired result.

However, these goals are not always bad or selfish. For example, using hypnosis, psychologists help people cope with difficult psychological conditions. Parents influence the child for educational purposes, the teacher applies manipulations to the students so that they learn their lessons.

The art of managing people will help you not only achieve your goals, but also avoid conflicts, recognize the tricks of manipulators and protect yourself from them. Where can you learn this skill? There are 2 ways:

• trainings;
• books.

On the Internet you can find a huge number of trainings that promise to teach you the art of managing people and how to protect yourself from manipulation. Such trainings, of course, are not free. But they will give you unique knowledge and techniques that other trainers do not have. And hurry up! After all, there is only one place left (either registration closes in 2 days, or the 40% discount is valid until tomorrow)!

Most often, this kind of manipulation is used in advertising training that is designed to teach you how to protect yourself from manipulation. How this works is that the user is told the unique value of the knowledge that he will receive in the course, and then he is limited in time to think and make a decision. You're already interested and, of course, you don't want to miss out on the last spot or day or discount.

As a result, you make a purchase. The manipulator achieved his goal. But whether you will get the cherished and promised result is not a fact!

Information on managing people is also contained in special books. Some books can be read for free online. Others will have to be looked for on the shelves in a store or library. Here are examples of such books:

• Sigmund Freud “Analysis of the Human Self and Psychology of the Masses”;
• V. V. Shlakhter, S. Yu. Kholnov “The Art of Dominance”;
• V. P. “The art of managing people”;
• Henrik Fexeus “How to read and control other people’s thoughts”;
• R.V. Levin “Mechanisms of manipulation. Protection from foreign influence.”

Is only theoretical knowledge enough to successfully apply it in practice and psychologically influence others? Or does the manipulator still have to possess a certain set of qualities?

Characteristics of the manipulator

Among public figures, manipulators to one degree or another include politicians, public figures, famous bloggers, and pop stars. Each of them pursues their own goals (to achieve victory in the elections, to gather a full house, etc.).

Many achieve success by influencing others. All manipulators have the following qualities.

1. Able to persuade. The manipulator is firmly confident in his position and can easily convince other people. Or, knowingly deceiving the “victim,” he will use all his acting skills and again convince her that he is right. If you want, develop the gift of persuasion.
2. Charismatic. This is the ability to create a positive atmosphere around yourself, win people over, conduct a conversation correctly and ultimately get what you want. It's great if you are a naturally charismatic person. If not, don't be upset. We have already prepared an article for you on how to develop charisma.
3. Eloquent. Most famous speakers are manipulators. Watch their performances and pay attention to how they address the audience, how they behave on stage, and how the performance itself is structured. One way or another, every speaker strives to “sell himself,” his product or service, using various psychological techniques.
4. Well versed in human psychology. The manipulator, first of all, evaluates the potential victim from the psychological side. He studies her strengths and weaknesses and assesses her emotional state. Having found a weak spot, he will hit it exactly there to achieve the desired result. At the same time, the manipulator will not risk getting involved with a strong, self-sufficient, harmonious and psychologically stable person.

As you can see, before you start studying methods of managing people, you must first study yourself, your strengths and weaknesses, work on charisma, eloquence and improve your knowledge in the field of human psychology.

Methods of psychological influence

There are a large number of methods of influencing human consciousness. They can all be combined into 3 groups.

1. Suggestion.
2. Influence on emotions and points of influence.
3. Techniques of intellectual influence.

Suggestion

Hypnosis is the most effective method that has a direct effect on the human psyche. The specialist introduces a person into a narrowed state of consciousness, when it is possible to easily control his behavior and instill some thought or attitude.

This method helps to cope with human psycho-emotional disorders. Only professionals with extensive experience should use this technique solely to help a person, to instill in him correct settings and bring him out of hypnosis without harm to the psyche.

Another interesting method of influencing consciousness is neurolinguistic programming (NLP). It allows you to manipulate people using words, gestures and facial expressions. NLP is based on knowledge from the field of psychotherapy, linguistics, and programming.

Despite the fact that the scientific community criticizes this method of influence, such techniques are successfully used and allow one to achieve the desired result. In particular, make a sale, successfully negotiate, obtain secret information from an intractable person, get a promotion at work, win over other people, etc.

Impact on emotions and points of influence

The psychology of managing people in general is based on managing a person’s emotions and physiological needs. In this case, it is enough to simply evoke a certain emotion in a person, which will push him to take the action you want. I will describe the basic emotions that are usually influenced by a manipulator.

1. Fear. Many manipulators use this convenient emotion. They simply intimidate people. They convince him that he will either be punished or lose something dear if he does not do what is required of him. For example, many parents often threaten their child by putting him in a corner or taking away his favorite toy if he does not obey them. Or another example - the manager intimidates employees by saying that he will not give them a bonus if they do not fulfill the plan. This is a rather primitive method of influence, as a result of which the victim will hate the manipulator.
2. Greed. In this case, no special talent of influence is needed. The manipulator simply convinces the victim that she will receive something very desirable, something she has long dreamed of, if she performs a certain act. Many managers use this at work. In particular, they promise employees a double bonus for exceeding the sales plan.
3. Vanity. Self-confident and vain people are practically helpless in the face of flattery, praise, and the approval of others. Simply praising them is enough, and they are ready to make a rash purchase or an illogical act.
4. Envy. Many people are affected by this vice. Activating this emotion is quite easy. The manipulator several times points out to the victim something good that the other person has, but the victim herself does not. And now she compares herself with that other person and begins to think in the direction the manipulator needs.

In addition to these basic emotions, each of us has certain points of influence.

1. Needs. We all strive to satisfy our basic needs in physiology, safety, and we also have ambitions, which are expressed in the desire for career growth and monetary income. Marketers skillfully use this when creating advertising. It is their tricks and correct presentation of information that encourages most people to buy advertised goods and services.
2. Weaknesses. It is rare to meet a person without flaws, addictions and shortcomings. Therefore, manipulators love to play on human weaknesses. For example, excitement, excessive curiosity, self-doubt, superstition and others.
3. Guilt. A person who cannot is the favorite victim of many manipulators. Feeling guilty, the victim agrees to everything that the “puppeteer” offers her. For example, some older people blame their adult children for completely forgetting about them. Although children call every day to inquire about the health of their parents, and always visit them on weekends. Unjustified feelings of guilt can prompt the victim (in this case, children) to move in with their parents. But, as a rule, this does not make it any easier for the manipulator. He begins to look for other reasons to blame the victim.

Techniques of psychological influence

I have selected several techniques and techniques for managing people that are quite easy to master. Many manipulators use them unconsciously. So, by studying these techniques, you will not only learn how to influence others, but you will also be able to protect yourself from provocations and manipulation by other people.

Limiting selection

Do you want to force a person to make a choice in your favor? Then offer him a limited number of options (for example, 2 or 3), each of which will be beneficial to you. Man by nature is designed in such a way that he does not like to complicate his life. Therefore, he will not come up with anything himself, but will choose one of the proposed options.

Showing gratitude

A gift or a compliment perfectly fulfills her role. Many of us have been familiar with this control technique since childhood, when we heard from our parents: “Come on, you put away the toys, and I’ll give you candy.” And since in my childhood sweets were rare and were given out only on holidays, I rushed to put things in order at the speed of a cheetah, just to receive the promised sweet gift. For adults, such “candy” is bonuses, getting the desired position, etc.

Demanding more

To use this technique, first ask the person for much more than you actually need. Or, for example, ask him to do something very unusual, which he will definitely enjoy.

After a little time, contact him again with a request. But this time, ask for what you really need. This time the “victim” will agree, because the person will be embarrassed to refuse you 2 times in a row, and your second request will seem much easier to him than the first.

State of stress or absent-mindedness

Managing a person who is under stress is very easy. In such an unstable emotional state (depression, fear, depression, despondency, prostration), it is easy to suggest anything to a person. It doesn't matter to him what to believe, he needs hope. Unfortunately, many scammers take advantage of this. In particular, gypsies love to manipulate people who are not in the best frame of mind.

If you want to get a positive response from a person, but you understand that in a calm environment he is unlikely to agree with you, then create special conditions. In noisy places, in crowded places, or when a person is in a hurry, he makes decisions very quickly, without having time to weigh them and think carefully about them. In such conditions, you are more likely to achieve your goal.

Mirroring

Do you want to please another person? Then carefully copy his gestures, facial expressions, and manner of speech. Psychologists have proven that this technique works on a subconscious level and is effective in most cases. People are subconsciously drawn to those who are similar to them.

To continue learning techniques for managing people, I recommend that you watch the following video.

Conclusion

Now you know how to manage people. This knowledge will be useful in any area of ​​life, even if you are not going to directly manage a team. I only talked about a small number of manipulation techniques and techniques.

I really hope that you will not use them to subjugate another person. After all, manipulation is a kind of deception. Therefore, use the acquired knowledge for good, repel the attacks of manipulators who try to influence your consciousness. And to get what you want, learn to achieve them. Then you won't have to resort to all these tricks. Be a strong, self-sufficient, harmonious person - and manipulators simply won’t risk messing with you.

Have you ever had to manage people? Share your stories in the comments!